Huanted
by high off of strawberry pocky12
Summary: It's moments like this that I wish I had all my memories back." After waking up from a coma, Shuuichi can't remember anything before his 24 birthday. Almost two years after he starts having dreams and flash backs. What do they mean?
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys! Long time no see! So i'm back, with another Gravitation story. I haven't done one for this fandom in quite sometime.**

**All of you who are reading and waiting for my AkuRoku story update. DON'T WORRY. I know its amost been a year, but I've finally started the next chapter and its looking good! So I haven't given up on it!**

**Anyway, I do not own Gravitation, just my ideals.**

**So read and Enjoy.**

**Oh and to clear things up: 0-0-0 means a scene change!**

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_It was dark, too dark. I could feel the pain, the fright, the anguish build up in my chest. It hurt; it hurt so much it was almost suffocating._

_I reached out in front of me to keep myself from running into things. My hand collided with a wall, now all I needed to do was find the exit. _

_I took slow, painful steps toward what I presumed was the exit to the hell I was in. "Where do you think you are going?"A cold malicious voice asked sending chills down my spine. _

_I quickened my pace not wanting to run and trip, but my efforts were in vain. _

_I felt something collide with my stomach, sending my falling to the ground._

_I clutched my stomach tightly trying to take in a breath. _

"_Who said you could leave?" _

_I tried to plead with my attacker, but it didn't work. It kicked me hard in the ribs; I coughed squeezing my eyes shut. Something inside me was telling me that tonight was my end. _

_I chocked back the tears, knowing that they would just piss it off even more._

"_Are you crying again?" It said, venom dripping from every word. _

_I curled myself into a ball knowing what was going to happen. I could practically feel its foot pull back as he got ready to plunge it into my side…_

I sat up quickly, taking in sharp breaths. It was just another dream, another sick twisted dream.

I used the sleeve to my pajamas to wipe the sweat from my face.

It had been happening for awhile now. I would wake up drenched in sweat because of my horrid dreams. I'm not sure why I keep having them, but I do.

I looked over at the digital clock on my night stand. Ten to six, I still had an hour to sleep. I took in a deep breath and pushed the blankets off of me, I decided to go into work early today.

My name is Shuuichi Shindou, I'm twenty five with unruly pink hair, large amethyst eyes, a small frame, pale skin, and no memory of before my twenty fourth birthday.

My best friend Hiroshi Nakano, and the guitarist of my band, tells me that I was in a coma for awhile and that I must have forgotten something's…a lot of things.

Do you know how frustrating it is to lose your memories? I had to re-memorize my own songs, I have to listen to my friends and band mates talking about things that I am supposed to remember, but don't. I meet people every day who are hurt because I can't remember them when I should.

Ever since I woke up almost two years ago, I've been troubled with all these tedious acts. And on top of it all two months ago, I've been having these weird dreams and flash backs, and they're not very pretty!

I took in deep breaths trying to steady my still fast beating heart. I hate mornings like this, they always seem to drain all the energy away from me.

I turned on the shower and stepped in. It didn't even occur to me that the water was freezing, and that the water felt as if it was stabbing into my skin.

I was having another flash back, I knew I was. Images of golden hair and golden eyes flashed in my mind along with the stabbing pain in my chest.

_I was standing in a dark room again, but this time there was a little light. The person I was staring at was illuminated by the light of the computer screen. _

_I must have said a name, because the person looked over at me. I could see the sine of his golden blonde hair, and the lamination of his eyes, but his face…it was dark. _

_I can't hear anything, but for some reason I know he said my name. _

_He shook his head and looked back at the computer. I could feel my heart break as I slowly turned away to retreat out of the room._

I took in another deep breath, shaking my head I snapped out of the flash back.

That's always how the flash backs are, they usually have same golden hair and golden eyes. I knew them very well as if they were apart of myself, my being, but I don't know whom they belong to.

I got out of the shower, wrapping my shivering body up in a nice warm fluffy towel.

I rubbed my arms trying to warm them up as I walked back to my room. I was pretty sure that my band mates were going to be surprised to see me on time, none the less early.

The one thing Hiro said that hasn't changed is the fact I'm always late to work.

0-0-0

"Good morning Shuuichi."

I looked up from the note book I used to write lyrics in. "Good morning K."

"You're early again; this has been a common occurrence lately."

I sighed leaning back in my chair, "I've been having some trouble sleeping lately…"

"Do you have any idea why?" Mr. K asked sitting next to me.

"I supposed it's due to all the weird dreams I've been having…"

"Dreams huh? What kind of dreams?"

"Weird ones;" I took a piece of pocky out of the box. "Most of them have something to do with me getting beaten.

K visibly flinched; all of my friends do when I bring up certain things. I guess it has something to do with my past, not that I would know or anything.

"Do you know who is beating you?"

I bit off a piece of my pocky stick and sighed. "I don't know; I'm always in a pitch black room."

The door to the band room opened and K looked over pretty quickly. "AH! Hiroshi, Fujisaki!"

"Good morning Mr. K;" they greeted.

I sighed and finished off my pocky; "so what are we doing today?"

"We actually have a meeting with Tohma, Nittle Grasper, and a famous lyricist, about the upcoming conjoined CD."

K, Hiro, and Fujisaki shared a knowing glance. It was moments like these that I wish I had all my memories back.

0-0-0

(Normal P.O.V)

"It's been two years now Eiri-san, aren't you even the slightest bit nervous?"

"Of course I am, but all the therapy and rehab has helped me."

"There are some things you should know Eiri." Tohma said sitting down next to Yuki on the couch in his office.

"Like what Seguchi?"

He took in a deep breath; "Things have changed, people have changed, Shindou-san is not the same as you remember."

"That doesn't surprise me Seguichi; I didn't expect him to be the same, nobody ever stays the same…especially after what he's been through…"

"Yeah but, I mean…" Tohma sighed, having been interrupted by a knock on the door. "I guess you'll just have to find out during the meeting."

0-0-0

(Back to shu's p.o.v)

I was nervous, extremely nervous. Because out of all my memories of the past, loving Nittle Grasper is one of the few I remember. So I couldn't help but feel nervous at the thought of being in the same room as my idol, Sakuma Ryuichi.

"Come along Shuuichi, Tohma won't wait forever!" K yelled at me from the door.

I nodded and took in a deep breath, "alright, let's go."

Hiro and Fujisaki nodded and fallowed K into the office; it took me a few seconds, but I soon fallowed my band mates in as well.

"Thank you for joining us."

I put on my best grin and looked over at Tohma; "Sorry Seguchi-San."

He shook his head and motioned for all of us to sit on the opposite couch.

I sat down with Hiro and Fujisaki on either side of me, and K next to Hiro.

Nervously I shifted in my seat; the tension in the room was thick, so thick I could have cut it with a knife.

"So about the upcoming Bad Luck and Nittle Grasper conjoined CD. I was thinking that we needed a lyricist for the songs the two bands will be creating together. Because if we let our two vocalists work on it together, the songs will never be written."

Mr. K nodded already for-seeing the headaches and what not.

Seguchi and K started to talk about things that didn't particularly interest me. So I took this opportunity to look around Seguchi's office.

All of Nittle Grasper was in the room, which I expected of course. But it was the tall blonde man in the corner that interested me. "Seguchi-san is that the lyricist?" I pointed at him.

Seguchi looked back at to whom I was pointing at. "Ah yes, Yuki come here please."

The man turned around and stared straight at me with his piercing golden eyes.

They were intense, eating at my very soul. They were familiar, but yet unknown. His eyes, they brought back pain, lots and lots of pain.

I gripped my head in anguish, trying to push back the flash backs.

"Shu, are you ok?" Hiro asked gripping my shoulder.

"I'm fine Hiro…I'm fine."

"Are you sure? You don't seem so fine."

Despite all the pain I managed to look up at Hiro; "I'm…fine."

I looked over to the man with golden eyes then nothing; I blacked out.

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	2. Chapter 2

**Hey, new chapter up already! WOO go me! I usually write longer chapters D= oh well you guys can forgive my short chapters.**

**I all so would like to apologize for how much it jumps around and how boring it is. But sadly every story has to be boring before it can get better.**

**I would like to thank:**

**801-addict: Silly imooto-chan its good to know that you are indeed alive! The first chapter looked like the begining of a story because it was...silly.**

**Secrets hidden within me: Thank you for the review! Reviews are the things that honestly keep me going. **

**ShuTheMadOne: I am continuing this story. Does it say complete on it or something? Maybe I should check that. Lol. It would be pretty stupid of me to leave it at the first chapter.**

**AmyThePineApple: First of all, your name it makes me giggle! Here is the update you wanted ; D **

**shadowsgirl67: Thanks for the compliment on my writing style. Its good to hear that somebody likes it, because I sure don't! Lol**

**PrincessFlame91: I agree. A lot of angst stories these days concentrate a lot on the emotions of the people. Its alright to portray emotions like that sometimes, but I don't like it when thats pretty much the whole story.**

**lilgurlanima: ; D question answered. Read and you'll find out how Yuki takes it!**

**Jade-t9: Thanks, I hope this chapter doesn't disappoint you to much! **

**Oh and thanks to all those who added the story to your favorits/alert list!**

**Now on to the story!**

**Disclamer: Chi-chan/HOOSP doesn't own gravitation! She wishes she did thought.**

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"What's going on?"

"Is Shu-kun going to be ok?"

"Kuma-chan is worried about Shuuichi too!"

All these voices, where are they coming from? Who do they belong to?

"I wonder why he blacked out…"

Everything around me is black; a familiar calmness has taken over my body. There is nothing, no emotion, no pain, no worries.

"Come on Shuuichi, don't do this to me again."

I know that voice…"HIRO!" I scream into the darkness. I wanted to see Hiro, but I don't want to feel the pain again.

"_You won't." _

What? Who's there? I thought, standing up from sitting position.

"_You never have to hurt again Shuuichi. But you need to jump over your past hurdles."_

It's not that easy! My past hurdles the voice says, but I don't remember my past, how can I get over it when I can't remember it.

"_Make yourself remember it!"_

How do I remember it? My friends won't tell me anything, I do keep having these flash backs but they're not very descriptive.

"_What happens in these flash backs Shuuichi?"_

My flash backs? They usually have something to do with a man, a man with golden hair and golden eyes.

"_Maybe that's the key to your past Shuuichi. You need to find this man; I bet he could help you."_

I didn't even think of that! It makes perfect sense!

"_Heh, he did always say you were a little bit slow and dense."_

You're a mean voice!

"_Whatever, it's time for you to wake up now. Your friends are all waiting."_

The comforting darkness started to slowly fade away, being replaced by a sharp piercing light.

"You guys shut up, he's waking up!"

I slowly open my eyes, instantly regretting it. The lights were bright, and they instantly gave me a head ache.

"Shuuichi, are you alright?"

"I think so."

I tried to sit up, but Hiro pushed me back down. "Take it easy Shu."

"I'm fine Hiro, all I have is a killer headache."

He sighed and stepped away from me a bit. I sighed and sat up; I was still in Tohma's office, which is a good thing. I don't think I could handle waking up in another hospital bed.

"Mr. K, I think we should save the rest of this meeting for another time." Tohma said brushing a few stray hairs from his eyes.

Mr. K nodded; "I think that would be the best idea."

I rubbed my eyes trying to adjust to the lights. "We don't have to cancel the meeting because of me."

"Not cancel Shindou-san, just postpone."

I sighed looking over at Tohma, "but this is an important matter though. We're all busy, I bet even Yuki-san is busy." I looked over at the blonde lyricist.

"I can make time." He said calmly putting out his cigarette. He looked so calm at first glance, but I could see something under that façade, something like worry, regret, pain, loneliness. This man, he intrigued me. I was pretty sure that he was a clue to my past. Now what did I have to do to get my memories back from him?

"_Befriend him stupid." _

I was getting damn sick of that little voice in my head. It had better not be there for the rest of my life, I didn't want to be classified as crazy.

"Come on Shuuichi, let's go back to the recording studio."

I looked over at Hiro and nodded. "I have all of a sudden become inspired to write."

0-0-0

"Hey Shuuichi…"

I jumped at the unfamiliar voice behind me. I grabbed my pocky from the vending machine and turned around.

"Oh hey…Yuki-san wasn't it?"

Yuki looked a bit sad, a bit disappointed, and a bit hurt.

"You don't remember me huh?"

I sighed, another case of meeting somebody who remembers me but I don't remember me.

"I'm sorry Yuki-san; I hardly remember everything before my twenty fourth birthday... I was in a coma."

Yuki sighed and gently brushed my cheek with the back of his hand. "I know Shuuichi, I just couldn't believe that you forgot me."

I blushed clutching my pocky to my chest. For some reason this man's touch made my heart pound and my stomach flutter.

"I…I…I'm sorry, I really do wish I could remember."

Yuki sighed letting his hand slip off my cheek. "I want to help you remember, if you'll let me."

"You can help me remember?"

He nodded and kissed my four head. He slipped a piece of paper into my hand. "I'll talk to you later Shuuichi."

I clutched the paper in my hand watching Yuki walk away.

0-0-0

"So tell me what's been happening this week Shindou-san?"

I looked from my therapist face up to the ceiling. "Well I keep having weird dreams and random flash backs."

"So the usual?"

"Yeah, but earlier today, I met someone. He is the lyricist Seguchi-san has hired…he looks like the guy in my flash backs."

"The guy with the golden hair and eyes?"

"Yeah that one; he looked over at me and I got a really bad headache and blacked out."

"You blacked out?" She wrote some things down on her pad of paper.

"Yeah, it was only for a minute though. But the thing is, Yuki-san he said he could help me remember my past."

My therapist looked up from her paper; "Yuki-san you said?"

I nodded; "yeah, he's a really handsome guy."

"Are you sure you can trust him Shindou-san?"

"If he can help me remember my past, what else is there to lose?"

"Are you even sure you want to remember your past?"

I sat up from my laying position quickly. "Of course I want to remember my past! I want to remember all the friends I've made over the years, I want to remember all my school years, all the fun things that happened with my friends and family."

"And the bad things…?"

I paused for a second and took a deep breath. "I…I want to remember those too."

"What if you can't handle what happened."

I glared at her; "you're supposed to be my therapist, I'm here for you to HELP me remember my past."

"I'm also here to protect you. Yuki-san…he could bring up some painful memories."

"I think that's all for today."

She nodded and closed her note book, "I'll see you next week."

I shook her hand and walked out of her office.

I was confused, weren't therapists supposed to help you with your problems, not create more?

I leaned against the wall outside of her office. I pulled out my phone and dialed the number Yuki-san had given me.

"Hello, Yuki-san? Do you want to go to dinner tonight?"

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	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Hey I'm back! I apologize for taking so long to upload this. It's been written for quite some time, but I've been so busy. Two weeks ago I was busy getting ready and packed for a Convention. Which by the way was fun as all hell. And last week was halloween, and I was busy getting ready for that too! So I'm sorry this is a bit late, but hey its up now! **

**Oh and I've got a new story thats going to be up soon. So my time is going to be a little divided.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation. All I own is the twisted ideas that come out of my mind.**

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I glanced out the peep hole on my door to see a pair of golden eyes staring back at me.

"Yuki-san;" I said pulling the door open. "Thanks for agreeing to have dinner with me."

He stared at me, a poker face firmly planted on his face. "It's no problem Shuuichi. I was actually hoping that you'd call me."

I grinned and grabbed my jacket; "well I'm ready when you are."

0-0-0

"So tell me Yuki-san…"

"Yuki…"

"Excuse me?"

Yuki took a drag from his pre-meal cigarette; "call me Yuki; I hate formalities."

I blushed and gulped; "alight, Yuki, how exactly do you know me?"

He put out his cigarette in the provided ash tray. "You were my "lover."

His lover? I had a feeling that I was gay, since I had no attraction to girls at all. But if Yuki really was my lover, then why hadn't Hiro bothered to tell me of him? You'd think that having a lover would be an important thing to know…

"My…lover…?"

"If that's really the right word to call our complicated relationship then yes, I was your lover"

I gave him an intrigued look; "our relationship was complicated?"

Yuki sighed and leaned over the table slightly. "I wasn't the best of men Shuuichi. I didn't treat you the way you deserved to be treated."

"But you don't seem to be all that horrible."

"That's because I've changed…I had to, I wanted to…"

For a minute I could see pain, suffering, resentment, and sorrow flash through his face.

"Look Shuuichi, a good part of your pas is horrible and full of pain. Are you sure that you want to remember all that?"

I clutched the arm of my chair tightly. Why was everybody so sure I didn't want to know my past? I am pretty damn sure that I deserved to know everything about me, good or bad. It's my past after all.

"Yes Yuki, I…I want to know."

Our waiter put our plates of food down in front of us.

"Alright then Shuuichi, I can't say I didn't warn you… But for now, let's eat."

0-0-0

_My heart was pounding loudly as my skinned burned with every kiss Yuki trailed across my skin. I could practically feel the passion and sexual tension hanging thickly in the air._

_The scene was practically straight out of a movie. My hands were tangled in Yuki's hair; which was as soft as the silk sheets beneath my bare back. His face was serious and concentrated, with skin smooth and perfectly lit by the moon streaming through the blinds._

_I moaned lightly as Yuki led a trail of small bites and nips up my neck. _

_It drove me crazy when Yuki was like this; so gentle but aggressive at the same time._

_I moaned again when he bit down on the skin underneath my ear._

_I could see the sadistic smirk grace his lips as he leaned down to whisper in my ear._

_Something wasn't right though. When he opened his mouth to speak, all I could hear was an annoying beeping sound._

_Many times he whispered to me, but all I heard was the beeping._

I woke up drenched in sweat and my pajama bottoms wet.

I quickly turned off the annoying beeping, which I figured out was my alarm clock.

The night before Yuki informed me of how he was going to help me remember my past.

He was going to slowly take me to memorable places, show me memorable things, and tell me important details. He also told me that it was going to be a long process of remembering; that it wasn't going to remember in one day.

As if I didn't know that already…

I got up and slowly made my way to the shower, the dream I just had re-playing in my head.

I want to know if it was a flash back or a wet dream. It could be either. I am very much attracted to Yuki, that much is obvious. So it could just be a wet dream. But Yuki said we were lovers once, so it could very be a flash back.

I groaned and turned on the water, letting the heat wash over me.

I decided that it was in fact too early to try and figure things out.

0-0-0

"You look tired Shu…"

I looked over at Hiro with tired eyes. It had been a week since I had dinner with Yuki, and every night I was having odd dreams. Well more unusual than my usual weird dreams. These dreams have been making it hard for me to sleep.

"I'm fine Hiro, I've just been staying up late working on the new songs…" Lies…

"Alright Shu, just don't make yourself sick."

I nodded and returned to my work.

"Excuse me are you busy Shuuichi?"

Again with the interruptions! Once again I look up from my lyrics; but instead of Hiro, Yuki was staring down at me.

"Not really Yuki, do you need something?"

He nodded; "yeah, could I talk with you out in the hall for a minute?"

I nodded and quickly followed him out into the hall.

Making sure that the door clicked shut, I turned to look at Yuki. My heart was fluttering at the sight of him, all the dreams of him flooded through my head.

"So…?"

"This Saturday, will you go on a date with me?"

I smiled; "sure Yuki, but why?"

He grabbed my hand and slipped something cold into it. "I'll see you Saturday." He said and walked away.

He still is mysterious as ever…I think…

I looked at the object he had given me. It was a lighter with a worn out sticker picture stuck to it. For some reason the sight of it caused my heart to ache and my stomach to do back flips.

I examined it closer to find that it was a picture of Yuki and I.

0-0-0

"So despite the warnings I and your friends have given you, you've decided to seek your past with Yuki-san's help?"

I nodded staring at my therapist; "it is my memories. They've been stolen from me and I want them back."

My therapist let out a big sigh; "just be warned, I know your past Shindou-san and it's not pretty."

I smiled; "so I have been told. But I really honestly don't care."

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	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: This is my longest chapter yet! I was really inspired for this chapter, really I was.**

**Reviews:**

**Mia Cruz: First review for chapter number three! Thank you very much! HAHA don't be so mad at Yuki yet!! :D**

**AmyThePineApple: =D thanks for the review. ANNNNND your name still makes me giggle.**

**lilgurlanima: Shuuichi is really, really determined. But wouldn't you be too? Lol yes it is important to remember both good and bad; and he does. I'm just going to concentrate on a lot of the bad because I'm an angst writer. But I will mention the good too. Thanks for reviewing!**

**cain aidan: Hopefully this chapter is good ;D Thanks for the review.**

**TrinaMarina: Here have a new chapter along with a plate of cookies. Thanks for reviewing.**

**Yaoifangirl89: Lemon!? Le gasp! Me write such a thing? Lol probably not; I have yet to prefect my lemon writing skills. So...most likely not in this story. Sorry. D= Thanks for reviewing!**

**THANK YOU for everybody who reviewed the second chapter too! I'm sorry I didn't personally thank you, but I forgot =D and I seem to have misplaced your reviews in my inbox...**

**AND THANK YOU to all those who favorited Huanted, who is watching Huanted, and whoever is watching/favorited me!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Gravitation!**

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* * *

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_Empty…is all I see, all I hear, and all I feel._

_I know I should be hurting, I know that every inch of me should be in pain. But all I feel is emptiness._

"_Y…Yuki…" I managed to choke out._

_My throat is dry and sore from yelling and crying._

"_Shut up brat…" is my reply._

"_H…how…come?"_

"_Because you deserve it."_

_How come…why…why do I deserve to hurt?_

_I could feel tears leak out of my eyes; I really wish I wouldn't cry. Crying just makes it worse, it fuels him more._

"_Oh god, are you crying again?"_

_A foot collided with my rib cage, causing me to further curl up into a ball._

_Why couldn't he just leave me be? I've apologized many times, he just won't accept it._

_I looked over at Yuki my vision starting to fade to black._

"_Don't look at me that way…" Yuki slurred._

_So he's drunk, that's why…he doesn't get what's going on…he still loves me…he still…he…_

_My eyes slide shut and then there is nothing. NO sadness, no happiness, no pain, no anger, no love…no emptiness…nothing. _

_There is no darkness, there is no light; everything is void of anything._

_There are no thoughts; there is no movement, only blank. _

_While in this state of mind I do not remember anything. Everything, my happiness, my pain, it's all gone._

_All I remember is the bright light that blinded me._

_All I remember is the concerned look on Hiro's face as my eyes fluttered open._

"_Hiro…" I choke out._

_It feels weird to talk, as if I hadn't done so in a while._

"_Shuuichi…how do you feel?"_

_Shuuichi…is that who I am? It does seem to fit me…I think._

_How do I feel? No how does Shuuichi feel? But I am shuuichi, at least I think so."_

"_Shit…"_

_Hiro looks confused, was my answer not to his liking? _

"_Like shit?"_

I sat up quickly, my blankets having been ripped off of my body.

"About time, I thought you were dead."

Hiro crawled onto the bed next to me. "It seemed like you were having a bad dream."

"Hiro…I was beaten wasn't I?"

By the look on Hiro's face, I guess I am right.

"Had a dream about it did you? Yeah, Yuki beat you while he was drunk…"

"No!"

"No?"

"It wasn't Yuki, I'm sure of it."

Hiro sighed, "Still trying to deny it, even though you can't remember it."

"No, Yuki doesn't…I mean didn't beat me, ever!"

"How would you know Shuuichi? You can't remember anything!"

I glared at him; it's not _my _fault I can't remember.

"I know I can' remember; but trust me…there is something deep down inside of me that is telling me it's not Yuki."

Hiro sighed; "Whatever Shu, believe what you want."

0-0-0

"So where are we going?"

"Just for a simple walk, if that's alright with you."

I smiled and looked up at Yuki, "of course it is!"

Anything seemed fun as long as Yuki was there doing it with me.

"So where are we walking too?"

"Through a park."

"At night?"

He nodded and led me down a familiar path. I felt as if I had been here before, countless times.

I stopped walking when we got to a certain spot in the path.

A familiar gust of wind blew my hair out of my face as I slipped into a flash back.

_Walking through the same park; a younger me hums while reading over lyrics written on a folded piece of paper. _

_A sudden gust of wind takes me by surprise and pulls the paper out of my hand._

_I curse under my breath and start to chase the lyrics._

_That's when it's caught by a mysterious person. At first I think he's a foreigner; but when he speaks he is clearly Japanese._

"_Did you write this?"_

"_Um, heh…yeah." I stutter out taken back by his cold harsh tone. _

"_You write like you're at a third grade level. Is this drivel really your idea of a love song? Are you nuts?"_

_He let go of the paper and started walking again. _

_When he got a few paces away from me; he turned and looked back at me, cigarette dangling from his lips. _

"_If I were you, I'd conceder learning a reliable triad." _

_With that said he turned back around and walked away. _

"This…this is the first place I met you…"

Yuki nodded dropping the wasted cigarette to the ground. "Yes this is… this is where all the headaches, torment, annoyance, and fun began."

I stared at him; did he really hate me that much? Is it possible that he did beat me? No, it wasn't Yuki that did to me! There is only one way to find out for sure…

"Yuki…" he looked back at me.

"Did you…did you…beat me?"

Yuki took a drag of his fresh cigarette and sighed out the smoke.

"I may as well have…"

What the hell does that mean? "He may as well have!" Couldn't this man give me a straight answer ever?

"Is that a yes or a no?"

He turned away from me. "Come I have one more place I want to visit tonight."

I watched him walk back toward his car; this process would be a lot easier if he answered yes or no.

0-0-0

He took me to a fast food restaurant, well more like the street in front of it.

"Do you remember this street?"

Flashes of conversations about ghosts ran through my mind.

"I think so…"

"This is where you jumped in front of my car."

Flashes of rain, umbrellas, traffic, and the adrenalin of dashing out into a busy street fled through my mind.

"I…I remember…I was so mad that you had criticized my writing abilities. That when I saw a flashy foreign car, I knew it was yours. I had to make you apologize so I ran out in front of you."

"Lucky for you my Mercedes has good breaks."

I laughed; "that was a pretty stupid thing to do."

I looked over at him and grinned; he smirked slightly in return.

"Thanks Yuki…you are really helping me…I'm actually remembering things."

"Whatever kind…like you said they're your memories, you deserve to have them. I just feel obligated to help you get them back; because I did help you lose them."

"I'm grateful, I really truly am…"

He sighed; "I just hope you feel that way after you find them again."

0-0-0

"I had a dream…about the night I first slipped into a coma."

My therapist watched me curiously from behind her glasses. "So you know what happened?"

"Vaguely…" IJ said looking up at her. "Yuki…he was drunk, and I was beaten."

"That's correct; Yuki-san got drunk and ended up beating you."

"No…" I looked away from her face. "I don't think Yuki was the one who beat me…"

"Ha Nakano-san contacted me and told me you are in denial."

"I'm not in denial!" I sat up quickly. "Yuki…he may have ignored me, belittled my work and self-esteem, called me names, and thrown me out of the apartment many of times; but I know. I know that he never beat me!"

My therapist stared at me in complete shock. "How do you know all that? Do you remember?"

"Bits and pieces…"

"That is truly amazing Shindou-san. But the evidence shows that it was Yuki who beat you."

I took in a deep breath to calm my nerves. "Have you ever thought that maybe the "evidence is wrong? You can't be sure what happened unless you were there…and I was there and it wasn't Yuki!"

"Shindou-san there is a statement from Yuki-san where he admits to it. He said "I may as well have beaten Shindou Shuuichi into a coma."

"That's not admitting he did it! Since when did "may as well have" equal "I did?"

"And since when did you have the power of deduction?"

I gave her a weird look; "what does that have to do with anything?"

She sighed and shook her head; "never mind Shindou-san."

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**Love it? Hate it? Review it anyway!**


	5. Chapter 5

** Hey guys; sorry for the slow update! I didn't stop the story I swear! I just got a little distracted with my AkuRoku(kingdom hearts) story. I hadn't updated that one in a YEAR and I finally got muse for it...so...yeah. But here's chapter five! This chapter is going to be a little different, its not as focused on Shuuichi and Yuki!**

**Disclaimer: I no own!**

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Hiroshi Nakano sat down on the couch inside Bad Luck's practice room; his guitar perched on his lap as he strummed away.

"Hey Nakano."

Hiro looked up at Mr. K, the strumming on his guitar continued as he did so.

"Good morning K."

"Shindou-san isn't here…how surprising."

Hiro sighed and leaned the guitar against the couch. "I went to get him this morning…but we got into a fight. He said he wasn't coming in today…"

"So practice is canceled?"

Hiro nodded; "pretty much."

K sighed and sat next to the red head. He rested his arm behind Hiro's head; Hiro leaned into him without noticing.

"So K…how's Michel?"

"Good, he told me all about his first day of school the other day."

"Was it a good first day of school?"

"Yeah…"

Hiro hummed and leaned into the couch. "How is Judy?"

K tensed slightly; "Hey Hiro…can we not talk about her?"

Hiro looked up at him; how come?"

"She and I…we're over…"

"Oh…how come?"

K looked down at him with a serious face. "New subject…what did you and Shuuichi fight about?"

Hiro sighed and sat up straight. "He had a dream about the night he went into a coma… He said the details weren't very clear or specific. SO I thought I'd be nice and tell him what happened…but when I said Yuki had gotten drunk and beaten him, he freaked."

He yelled at me K; he said Yuki didn't beat him…"

Hiro choked back a sob; "He wasn't there…he didn't get a call from his best friends "lover" in the middle of the night. He didn't race to his best friend's house to find him bloody, broken, and unconscious."

He didn't have to deal with the police and all the questions about his best friend's lover. He didn't have to worry about whether his best friend would ever wake up from a coma or not…"

K sighed and rubbed Hiro's back; the only thing he could think of to comfort the distressed red head.

"Everything you said is True Hiroshi. But he did have to go through waking up and not remembering things. He is living with the knowledge that he doesn't remember important dates, important people, and important songs."

If you can remember, he couldn't even remember your birthday, his birthday even… He's depressed Hiro, and the only thing that can help him right now is to remember."

Hiro looked up from his hands; "but what if he does get his memories back and they rip him apart?

"I have a feeling Shuuichi knows that may happen. But he's willing to risk that to get his happy memories back."

Hiro sighed; "I'm not so sure if I can watch my best friend be broken by memories."

"So what are you going to do Hiroshi? He's going to remember whether you want him to or not. SO are you going to stop being his friend, quit Bad Luck, and further depress your friend?"

"No I can't do that to him…"

"You're right, he needs you right now Hiroshi…"

Hiro sighed and smiled at K. "Thank you K, for listening…"

K grinned and clapped him on the back. "You're welcome, what are friends for?"

Hiro smiled and looked away from K. "Yeah…friends…"

0-0-0

"What are you doing Eiri?"

"Getting ready for my date with Shuuichi; I thought it was obvious."

Tohma sighed; "that's not what I meant."

"Then maybe you should say what you mean."

"I meant, why are you trying to get Shindou's memories back?"

"Because he wants them back…"

"I thought you wanted another chance with him?"

"I do…"

"Then what are you doing?"

Yuki sighed; "I would rather have Shuuichiremember everything and forgiveme, than start completely over and live with the fact I know what I did and he doesn't."

"You didn't do anything Eiri…"

"Exactly!"

Tohma sighed; "you'vegot to forgive yourself…"

"I will once Shuuichi forgives me."

"And what if he doesn't?"

"Then, oh well…at least I tried."

Tohma sighed and walked over to Yuki. He placed both of his hands on his shoulders.

"The chance of Shindou-san forgiving you are slim…the odds are against you, get out while you still can."

Yuki pushed his hands off his shoulders. "I know the situation looks grim, but Shuuichi and I…we are an odd couple; so maybe things will work out."

"Betting your happiness on a maybe isn't the smartest thing to do Eiri."

Yuki glared at him one of his famous icey glares. "Shuuichi is my happiness."

Tohma laughed; he couldn't help himself. It wasn't everyday you heard lines like that come out of Yuki's mouth.

"What's so funny?"

"Since when have you been a cheesy man Eiri?"

"Shut up Seguchi and leave me to dress in peace."

"As you wish Eiri; just remember what I said and be careful."

Yuki sighed; "out!"

0-0-0

Hiro drummed his hands against his legs. He was waiting for Shuuichi to get out of therapy so he could apologize.

He stood up quickly when the door to Shuuichi's therapist opened.

Shuuichi walked out looking a little miffed; though nobody could blame him. The singer hadn't been in the best of mood as of late; and the attitude of his therapist and Hiro hadn't been helping.

Shuuichi stopped seeing Hiro standing directly in front of him, but down the hall a bit.

"Shuuichi…"

Shuuichi tried to side step him, but Hiro fallowed him. He frowned and tried to do it again; but with no luck.

He silently cursed the hallway for being so small.

"Alright Hiroshi, what do you want?"

Hiro chewed on his lip lightly, he took a step forward. "You and I have been best friends since high school…"

"I know that silly…"

"You do?"

Shuuichi nodded; "you are somebody I promised myself I would never forget."

Hiro smiled and chuckled lightly; "I've been a jerk…"

"Yes you have been!"

Hiro sighed looking down; "I'm just scared…that you'll break…"

"What am I, fine china?"

Hiro looked up at him confused. "China?"

"Yes; I'm not breakable Hiroshi…"

"I wouldn't be so sure."

Shuuichi glared; "I'm Shindou freaking Shuuichi, I. Am. NOT. BREAKABLE."

Hiro smiled sadly; "so you say…but Shuuichi, I've seen you broken."

Shuuichi's frowned deepened. "Hiro…I'm trying to remember all the other important people."

Hiro sighed; "I know, and I'm sorry for being such a jerk; I should support you no matter what."

Shuuichi grinned both of his hands on his hips. "Yes you should!"

Hiro smiled meekly; "so…do you forgive me?"

Shuuichi laughed; "of course! You're my best bud for life Hiroshi, no matter what you say!"

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**Is that a hint of KXHiro I smell? HAHA you bet your buttons it is! I love KXHiro so they shall be in this story too!**

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